Raw emotions

Weekly window visit

The entire world is starving for kindness right now.  Be good to each other today.  Participate in random acts of kindness to spread joy.  Pay for someone’s meal. Load money on a grocery store card. I would give anything to know the solution. Make it a point to start a conversation with a person that you might not wouldn’t normally have a conversation with. Get to know them and their story and listen

.
As a culture, we have so much to learn from one another’s experiences and backgrounds. We are all a product of our own individual upbringing. And that is what makes us all so diverse and wonderful and unique. As a community with so much suffering simply opening up and learning someone’s story is a great place to start. Listen and empathize with what you hear and the world would be such a better place. 


I can tell you first hand, as someone who has faced endless trauma, its times like this where the rug feels like it has been yanked from under you over and over. These are the times when you experience the most growth. All these feelings of uncertainty leads to a new stronger more dynamic version of yourself. It’s so hard to see that right now because we are all knee deep in pain but know that this is only temporary and the person that you will reemerge as it going to be stronger than titanium.


This constant feeling of being uncomfortable and endless “WTF’s” is strangely necessary for growth. Life can often seem like you are constantly treading water, just trying to keep your head out and I just want to say how proud of you I am you’re still treading. I hope that we all take the weight of what’s going on right now and let it guide us onto more empathetic people. I’ve been having tremendous trouble trying to wrap my head around the why’s of why is this happening for some time now. I can say the only thing that I can come up with is that the universe is trying to teach us a lesson of perseverance or empathy of some sort. It’s so much to try to understand.
 
I have been talking with friends right now about how for my entire life feels similarly heavy to the pain we are all feeling during Covid. Being a caretaker for 20 years, being at risk for HD and quite frankly navigating early life completely alone without guidance from any adult. Always having so many unknowns always going on. And just when you think it can’t get any worse boom, you’re wrong. Or just feeling like the entire universe was working against me. With the deepness of this current pain I can wholeheartedly tell you it will get better. This is not permanent. I know with my entire soul that if I can dig myself out of the trenches that so can you, I just need you to believe in yourself even when it seems
impossible.


Sitting here with the stillness since we aren’t able to go anywhere forces us to take a deeper look at ourselves because we are always so used to rushing around but being still with yourself unveils so many repressed feelings a lot of the time we have never dealt with. To those of you going through something like this my heart goes out to you and I can absolutely relate. Allow yourself to feel it all. Maybe this is a part of the universes plan to deal with your inner repressed feelings and get to know yourself on a deeper level.


I am well aware dealing with trauma has given me this enormous heart. I’ve said for a very long time I don’t think kind hearted people just happen, we are all a product of our upbringing and some of us have been brought in privilege and maybe this is your time to grow. Take this as an opportunity to gain perspective you would have never been able to see before this.


None of us feel like a pillar of strength right now and that’s okay. Allow yourself to feel what’s going on
around us.

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